Social media: what helps and what hurts

Social media can be a lifeline. It can keep you close to faraway family, help you find people who share a rare interest or condition, and remind you that others feel what you feel. It can also leave you scrolling at 2 a.m., comparing your life to everyone else's highlights.

Most people's experience is a mix. This page helps you tell the difference and set things up so the apps work for you.

What research says

For years, a popular idea was that passive use (scrolling and watching) hurts, while active use (posting, commenting, messaging) helps. Newer research is less clear.

• A Dutch study used 9 years of data from nearly 7,000 adultsYears of data in a Dutch study that linked both passive and active social media use to more loneliness over time (Roberts, Young & David, 2024)As of December 1, 2024.Published in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin. The link ran both ways: lonely people also used social media more.Source: Baylor University: Social media's double-edged sword – study links both active and passive use to rising loneliness. Both passive and active use were linked to more loneliness over time. The link ran both ways: people who felt lonely also turned to social media more.
• Like most research in this area, it shows links, not proof that social media causes loneliness.

So the lesson is not just "post more." What seems to help is using social media as a bridge to real contact: making plans, keeping up with people you actually know, joining groups that lead to calls or meetups. What tends to hurt is using it as a replacement for contact, or using it when you're already low.

Comparison and FOMO

Feeds show other people's best moments: weddings, trips, parties, new babies. When you feel alone, it's easy to think everyone else has more friends and a fuller life. "FOMO" (fear of missing out) is that sinking feeling that others are together without you.

Remember:

• You are comparing your whole life to their edited highlights.
• An app's algorithm chooses what you see, often what makes you react strongly, not what's most true or most helpful.
• Many people who look busy online feel alone too.

If an account regularly makes you feel worse, mute or unfollow it. They won't be told.

Platform by platform (October 2026)

Every app below is free to use; most make money from ads. What each is better or worse for when you feel alone:

• Facebook (Meta). Better for: Groups about local towns, hobbies, health conditions, grief, caregiving and parenting, plus events and staying in touch with family. Worse for: arguments, endless feeds, scams. Tip: use it mainly through Groups and Events.
• Instagram (Meta). Better for: keeping up with friends' lives, messaging, local businesses and art. Worse for: comparison, especially about looks and lifestyle; short videos can eat hours.
• TikTok. Better for: finding niche communities and feeling "seen" by others with the same experience. Worse for: very compelling feed that's hard to put down, late nights. Since January 2026, the U.S. app has been run by a new joint venture with mostly American investors.
• X (formerly Twitter). Better for: news and following experts in a field. Worse for: hostility and pile-ons. Owned by Elon Musk's companies.
• Threads (Meta). Better for: text conversations, often lighter in tone; linked to your Instagram account.
• Bluesky. Better for: text conversations and custom feeds you can choose; many people say it feels calmer. Smaller than the big apps.
• Reddit. Better for: anonymous discussion in communities about almost anything, including loneliness, health and hobbies; many cities have local communities that post meetups. Worse for: some harsh corners. Read a community's rules before posting.
• Discord. Better for: ongoing group chat and voice chat around games, hobbies, fandoms and study, the closest thing online to "hanging out". Worse for: unmoderated servers. In 2026 it began giving all accounts teen-safety settings by default, with age checks to change some of them.
• Snapchat. Better for: casual daily contact with close friends. Worse for: pressure to keep "streaks" going, and the Snap Map can show your location; consider turning it off.
• YouTube (Google). Better for: learning a skill, live streams with chat. Worth knowing: feeling close to a creator is a parasocial relationship. It can be comforting, but it's one-way.
• Nextdoor. Better for: local news, lost pets, borrowing tools, neighborhood events. Worse for: complaints and suspicion of neighbors. Shows your neighborhood to others, so share carefully.
• Group chats (WhatsApp, Signal, iMessage and others). Better for: small circles of people you know: family, old friends, a class. Often the most connecting kind of social media. Signal is run by a nonprofit and focuses on privacy; WhatsApp is owned by Meta.

Scams on social media

Scams often start on social media. Americans reported losing $2.1 billionMoney Americans reported losing in 2025 to scams that started on social media (FTC)As of April 27, 2026.Source: FTC Data Spotlight: Reported losses to scams on social media eight times higher than in 2020 in 2025 to scams that began on social media, and nearly 6 in 10People who lost money to a romance scam in 2025 and said it started on social media (FTC)As of April 27, 2026.Source: FTC Data Spotlight: Reported losses to scams on social media eight times higher than in 2020 people who lost money to a romance scam said it began there, according to the FTC. Be wary of strangers who message you out of the blue with friendship, romance or investment tips. See Dating apps for warning signs.

Teens and social media

In 2023, the U.S. Surgeon General issued an advisory on social media and youth mental health. It said up to 95%U.S. teens aged 13 to 17 who use a social media platform (Surgeon General advisory, 2023)As of May 23, 2023.More than a third said they use social media "almost constantly".Source: U.S. Surgeon General: Social Media and Youth Mental Health (2023) of teens aged 13 to 17 use social media. It also cited a study finding that teens who spent more than three hours a day on social media had about doubleAdded risk of depression and anxiety symptoms for teens on social media more than 3 hours a day (study cited in the Surgeon General advisory, 2023)As of May 23, 2023.From one study of 12- to 15-year-olds. It shows a link, not proof that social media caused the symptoms.Source: U.S. Surgeon General: Social Media and Youth Mental Health (2023) the risk of depression and anxiety symptoms. That shows a link, not proof of cause. The advisory said there wasn't enough evidence to call social media safe for young people, and urged families and companies to act.

Some apps have since added teen protections. Instagram's Teen Accounts are private by default, and since late 2025 teens under 16 see content limited to roughly a PG-13 level unless a parent changes it. Discord added teen-default settings in 2026.

If you're a teen, see Teens and pre-teens. If you're a parent, see Lonely children and teens.

Settings worth changing

• Turn off most notifications. Keep only messages from real people.
• Set app time limits in your phone's screen-time settings.
• Mute or unfollow accounts that leave you feeling worse.
• Hide like counts where the app allows it.
• Turn off location sharing (for example, Snap Map) and make your account private if you'd like.
• Use "following" or "friends" feeds instead of the default "for you" feed when the app offers it.
• Move apps off your home screen, or log out at night.
• Charge your phone outside the bedroom.

For more on phones and habits, see Phones, apps and the way we connect now and Screens, gaming, gambling, porn and other habits. To find friends online, see Friendship apps and online communities.